12 thoughts on “YOUR Personal Memorial Day: Remembering Uncomfortable Truths And Doing Something About It

    • Indeed!

      We’ve been on the same wavelength, lately.. Maybe it’s because we’re collaborating on NoF Geek And Gamer Pants Party (NOFGAGPP), who knows! The idea just sort of hit me, which is why I don’t have my usual off-site backlinks (with the exception of the Chris Brogan link, at least). That’s pretty cool!

      BTW, I had to fight the urge to say we are the product of the people around us. I agree with the statement, yet I feel we have more control than people would like to think! Certainly, both of our blog entries raise good questions about the need for human interaction…

      JulioFromNY’s article on relationships and defining friendships is a great read so check it out, folks. I like what I’ve soaked in thus far! 8)

  1. yes the old nurture vs. nature argument. It all comes back to your will of character and what choices you’re willing to make. Like Robert Frost’s poem, “The Road Not Taken” if you choose to let the people around you affect all your decisions then you will truly be a product of the people around you. Sadly most do just that. It takes a strong sense of character to go against the grain. I’d like to think that I’m one of those few people 🙂

    Yeah, the fact that we’re collaborating on a good amount of things may be a factor to the wave length thing. It has happened in the past 😀

    • I second that notion. Sadly, some people can confuse strong convictions with mere asshole tendencies.. To that I say, “T.S. Elliot”.. Bwahaha!

      Collaboration FTW! Now stop peering into my brain.. I’m going to have to make my next major article something completely random. =oP

  2. Questions to answer! (I think I’m the only one who does this ;] )

    1.)What are some of your warts or best/worst memories?
    Now here’s an interesting question and concept. I would hope this question is rhetorical, because if anyone did answer this, they wouldn’t be 100% honest, assume they were any percentage of honest.

    2.) What has kept you from reaching the success and/or fulfillment you seek?

    Another rhetorical? For this, most would find lame excuses or someone else to blame, yes?

    3.) How do you define success/fulfillment?

    Do you think anyone has the answer to this one? Maybe we spend our whole lives with some weird ideal that is SUPPOSED to be what fulfillment is; but maybe it’s just hype, and we’re looking too hard at something we’ve already got.
    Hell, I’d say a roof over your head, food, and friends – however you define that word – should be way more than enough.

    I feel as though the question points toward pure greed. Idk. Not being critical, just saying we look way too hard to have things that don’t matter.

    4.) How do you keep yourself driven?

    I don’t. I work too much and am constantly burnt out.

    5.) What is the WHY that drives you?

    My WHY doesn’t make me cry, btw. Doesn’t even touch me. I do what works, and emotion and whatever else be damned, because I think stuff like that just gets in the way.

    What I do, I never allow myself to do because I “feel” strongly about it. It must be logical. I won’t be like those emotional zealots who are for or against something (think No-Kill for easy reference) because of how it makes them feel.

    I want my WHY to be sound of reason (or as close to as possible) and a few other things…but emotional reasons….will never be a part of that.

    I sentence dogs to death. I place god forsaken amounts of stress on their minds to force them to deal with reality, cope with it, and learn alternative behaviors. If emotion factored into what I do, I’d never be able to do it. It would make me feel bad.

    Fuck that.

    I’d rather be a rock.

    • Thanks for sharing, as always, JJ!

      This post is definitely more about being honest with ourselves than with others. Few can put themselves out there like the rhetorical questions suggest you should.

      I got another question for you: is it possible to be passionate and not let emotion get in the way?

      These questions assume a desire to be a little more than just a survivor. To merely exist and survive, to some, may not be really living. It’s a matter of perspective, which is why I invite everyone to discuss!

      From what I gather in your comments, you believe that emotion is useless, a mere stumbling block. I mostly agree. I used to subscribe to more idealistic, romantic ways but that stuff can lead to lots of heartbreak, wasted effort, and disappointment. I think we agree there.

      When I say I strive for something more, I don’t speak of lavish lifestyles or material things, though that’s surely what some may strive for so I know what you mean there. Greed is a sad motiviation, though I suppose it works for some.. Or DOES it?

      My thing is you can’t count on external factors, whether it’s friends, how people make you feel, formal education, whatever.. Everything starts in and with you. I’m not suggesting people become anti-social bastards (though that also works for some), but becoming more self-sufficient.

      I feel that, to do that, you have to be sure of yourself and what makes you tick. To sum it all up: this article was meant more as a way to help people dig deeper within themselves. If someone is inspired by it, even better! =oD

      P.S. You’re one of the few people not afraid to comment. Everyone else seems to prefer giving me feedback and comments via Twitter, Skype, IRC, or whatever. LOL.. Speaking of which, I forgot to idle on IRC today! *gasp*

      • You dork! You’re not supposed to forget stuff like that.

        Don’t mind me; I wasn’t in a pessimistic mood yesterday, but was answering the questions as they struck me. I tend to forget how that can come off sometimes. (Yipe.)

        It really *sounds* pessimistic, though… I mean. Sheesh.

        Emotion can get in the way if it’s not in check. In my line of work, ALL I see is emotion getting in the way. I have an aversion to it because of that.

        Passion is emotion-driven.

        I just prefer logic, is all. Emotion and passion will always be there, and they’re always going to be a driving force in what I do…but they won’t be taking the driver’s seat.

        I guess. There’s too much suffering out there, in my field, and it’s hard for people not to break down when dog after dog comes in with holes in it’s neck from prong collars or so aggressive that you have to suggest this family kill their pet or so completely shut down because of trauma that you don’t even know where to begin, don’t even know if you can help at all.

        trainers get attached. It’s a sure bet that if you go to a positive trainer, they love your dog and will do almost anything to save her – even before they’ve met her.

        I guess I feel as though, as the trainer, I have no right to be that way. Not my dog. Not my struggle. And as I’m usually the one calling the shots, I will be the one with a clear head.

        If you break down over one…. how are you going to help the next one that comes in your door not an hour after that one? And the one after that? And the one after that?

        Get it?

        Emotion isn’t bad – but it’s hard enough without it.

      • Don’t worry: I gathered that much from your previous comments!

        I agree that things are hard enough without letting emotion get in the way but emotion definitely has it’s place if you want to live a remarkable life. I’m not talking fame and fortune because that stuff is for arrogant types that are waiting for a moment that may never come (SEE Dino Dogan’s article on failure through expecting to be discovered. I’m saying doing stuff that, at the end of the day, makes you feel accomplished, if not fulfilled. The emotional components there are undeniable. Why else do we take on causes or share opinions?

        You did come off a bit pessimistic but I tried to not read into it. It’s always difficult to understand the spirit of the written word, especially in the blog medium. That certainly makes a strong case for being literal.

        You’re absolutely right about not letting emotion break you down. It’s a tough thing to do.

        How do you focus on something relentlessly without being TOO attached?

        Hmmmm… Thoughts, abyone?

    • Glad you enjoyed it, bud!

      I had a moment of clarity, so to speak. I truly believe we all have moments in our lives where we find ourselves at a proverbial fork in the road but just keep trudging onward. These are missed opportunities to better ourselves.

      I’ve had plenty of these missed opportunities so I can only hope I inspire others to dig a little deeper. Ever feel like you’re just coasting along? I do. I’ve learned to be my own worst critic, which may be why I sometimes beat up on trolls (but that’s a whole other discussion). I’m hoping this article inspired at least one person, without sounding like mere rhetoric.

      Believe me, we’re all deep at times. Some are more subtle in their methods. For example, your blog conveys many underlying themes so, although you lead in with the humor of it all, I often find myself asking, “Why do people do such things?” There’s a lesson or value to be drawn from anything, really. I can certainly relate to frustrations with silly customers, BTW. ;o)

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